I have this weird road block when it comes to posting on my blog. First of all, I can't bring myself to publish a new post until at least one person has commented on the current one. Like, I'm afraid someone will feel left out if they don't get a chance to read and comment on a post if they so choose.
That means that if, say, I have something else that I want to write about I have to either write it and save it or I have to try and hold it in my brain and remember it until I feel like everyone has gotten a fair chance to speak their piece.
I have written some 284 blog posts, give or take, and my sister has posted on all but one, maybe two of them. She is frequently my first commenter.
Thus, when my last post went three 3 tres whole days and not a word, I was starting to feel like it was time to move on, but I was stuck. Without a comment from my sister the post didn't feel "official" and how could I write a new one if that one hadn't yet been, to use TAMN's phrase, validated?
And then I started to panic. What if she isn't commenting because something is wrong? Calm down, I told myself, maybe she's at Susi's wedding. I looked at the fridge. That wedding isn't until next week. (I wish I could go!) I thought maybe she just didn't like that post and had nothing to say, that's reasonable to think, so I spent hours last night "redesigning" my blog, thinking that would spur her to say something. (Am I coming across as really needy here?)
I couldn't take it anymore this morning. I called her. "So, how have you been?" I ask her, feeling 30% nervous, 35% foolish, and 35% hungry for tortilla chips.
"Good" she answered, still oblivious to my inner turmoil.
"So, I mean like, everything's ok? I was kind of getting worried cuz I haven't heard from you in a while" I say.
"You mean because I haven't commented on your blog yet?" She's caught on now.
"Uh, yeah" I admit. She tells me she's been busy and we talk for a while. A few hours later I check my email and lookee there, she has commented.
I read her comment, and feeling deeply satisfied (I ate the entire rest of the bag of tortilla chips) I thought, "Oh good, now I can write a new post." And see how I don't let not having anything important to say stand in my way? No, my only road block in writing new posts is all about the comments, or lack thereof. I'm 30% ashamed to admit that, 35% hoping you will have something to say about that, and 35% wishing we had some Oreos.
Don't worry, my sister really is ok. You know the hardest thing about living in Nebraska? It's feeling like my main connection to family and far away friends is Skype, Facebook, and the comments you leave on my blog. So thank goodness for technology!
AND just so you know, I do have two oreos, and 2% of this post was written tongue in cheek. (But I'm serious about the Oreos. I wouldn't kid about that.)