Hip Hip Hooray! What Would You Say?
I recently found out that someone I am close to is pregnant. Yay, yay, hip hip hooray! I am not going to say who, because that is their news, and not mine. In the course of the discussion of her hopes and dreams and plans for this pregnancy she mentioned that she really wishes I could be there. Now, it is highly unrealistic to think that I could be there for the actual birth, much as I would like to. I think there are various reasons why she wishes I could be there, most of which I will not say because, again, it is her news to share how, when, and with whom she may, not mine, and telling you why she wants me there may give too many clues about who she is. But one reason I can share that I think she might want me there is because I am pretty enthusiastic about the whole giving birth thing. I mean, I recognize it's awful painfulness as much as the next girl, but the whole thing is really pretty incredible when you get right down to the nitty-gritty-dirty-does-it of it all, am I right? Right.
So, somewhere in the bubblegum pink recesses of my mind, or perhaps hers, the idea came. I'd just make a recording of all the reassuring, encouraging, enthusiastic, you-can-do-it's, you-are-great's, you-are-beautiful, you-are-woman let's HEAR YOU ROAR of it all.
Cuz you know, we women like to roar when we are giving birth. I mean, maybe we don't 'like' to, but it happens. IT HAPPENS.
Anyway. So, this is where you come in. I have plenty of ideas mulling around. PLENTY. But I don't know if it is enough to make a whole recording. Let's say she's in labor for two days. TWO DAYS of material is what I'd need for that kind of easy listening.
Please, tell me your favorite thing someone said to you while you were in labor. Or, please, tell me what you wish someone had said to you when you were in labor. Or what you hope they will say someday when you are in labor.
AND please, please, please, tell me what someone said that made you want to cry, or quit, or kick 'em where it counts. You know what I mean.
I want it all. Thanks.
P.S. I apologize, I was kind of hyper when I wrote this. Thanks for your help regardless.
So, somewhere in the bubblegum pink recesses of my mind, or perhaps hers, the idea came. I'd just make a recording of all the reassuring, encouraging, enthusiastic, you-can-do-it's, you-are-great's, you-are-beautiful, you-are-woman let's HEAR YOU ROAR of it all.
Cuz you know, we women like to roar when we are giving birth. I mean, maybe we don't 'like' to, but it happens. IT HAPPENS.
Anyway. So, this is where you come in. I have plenty of ideas mulling around. PLENTY. But I don't know if it is enough to make a whole recording. Let's say she's in labor for two days. TWO DAYS of material is what I'd need for that kind of easy listening.
Please, tell me your favorite thing someone said to you while you were in labor. Or, please, tell me what you wish someone had said to you when you were in labor. Or what you hope they will say someday when you are in labor.
AND please, please, please, tell me what someone said that made you want to cry, or quit, or kick 'em where it counts. You know what I mean.
I want it all. Thanks.
P.S. I apologize, I was kind of hyper when I wrote this. Thanks for your help regardless.
Oh I have lots of cry-wanna quit-kick em where it counts stories. In fact I did kick a guy where it counted. Uhhhhh maybe you could tell that story. Bahahahah! I'll send you all my good stuff via email. ;) and if this said pregnant person is someone I know then I'm excited too!! Hahaha
ReplyDeleteAnd just for the record you are pretty enthusiastic and encouraging for things that are important and also hard and painful. Remember my first 5k? You might be the only reason I didn't ball up in some bush and cry. For reals. Keep being awesome Ames!
I didn't go unmedicated with the first two because I whimped out (and was induced with M). But I did get to 9 cm before the epidural kicked in, so I did feel a bit. (At least that's me saying I am kind of brave...)
ReplyDeleteAnyway - best things said to me or I have seen help with my patients were telling them was when you could watch the contraction on the monitor you could tell them when they/I were past the peak of it. Just simple things like "you can do it", "You are strong enough", helping them just think about getting through that one contraction (when I thought that my epidural might not work at all I would start to freak).
When it came time for pushing I noticed people liked when I would say "push into the pain/burn."
As far as what I didn't like - too much humor (once in a while it was good, but too much gets annoying), "good girl" (I hated that, seemed like I was a dog in training), etc. Really it depends on the personality - get her really tired or really cranky and see what works best to calm her down :)
PS - maybe you should come to my birth of #3 for practice. I might try it unmedicated.
Every lady is different, but I like that you're doing research for her.
ReplyDeleteWhile I was dealing with contractions Nick would talk me thorough relaxation... He'd remind me to relax my face and hands and he'd talk all slow and end-of-yoga-work-out like. One time, he told me "you're a stick of butter... and the bed is a warm plate... Melt into it." That one actually made me laugh really hard and he had to walk me thru relaxing all the parts of my body again.
Is this her first? I can't remember. Anyway, let her know to speak up for herself, and while doctors are very knowledgeable and all that, she should trust her instincts. I wish I would have stopped one of my doctors from doing something I found really distracting a lot earlier in my labor. Once this doctor was called away for a moment, my suspicions were confirmed and the lack of their bothersome actions (this is all very vague, isn't it?) helped my stalled labor to progress. I thought since they were the doctor, whatever they were doing must be essential. Now I know that I could have spoken up, and wish I had.
One of my nurses said "wow, you're so powerful" and that was kind of fun. I don't know how that would come off on a recording, however. I do like the reminder that this is what our bodies are built for, we're made for it.
That's all I can think of for now, have fun. Bye now.
Dear Hyper Amy, It may not surprise you that I have never given birth to a new baby. However, our doctor did invite me into the delivery room for our last baby's birth. He said the invitation was to insure that it would be our final. I was standing by the bed holding grandma's hand. The nurse said, "You look a little pale. If you pass out and fall down on the floor, we'll walk on you. We have our hands full, we don't have time to care for you." Grandma asked her to please get me a chair, so she did. I sat down until we heard the "WAAAA". Then she excused me to go sit on the couch. So, I went out to the couch and said a lot of "Thank You" prayers. Love, grandpa H.
ReplyDeleteI love being pregnant and giving birth - I mean who designed this process? Isn't it the most miraculous thing on this earth? Sometimes I say that in my next life I would like to be an obstetrician - ha ha. I had the most incredible experience a few years ago to be in the delivery room when a grandchild was born. THANK YOU!! What an adrenalin rush.
ReplyDeleteI think going with the pain, and not fighting it is helpful. Also I watched the clock and monitor during contractions, it helped me to see that while 60 seconds can seem forever, time was passing, and it would be over. Trying to relax and visualize your baby moving down and not tensing your muscles to keep him in there is good too. Good luck.
Oh I like what Ann said about time actually passing and that it won't last forever.
ReplyDeleteYou might want a track on there for her to listen to if she does decide to get pain medication, so that she will feel better about the decision.
I would say something about how her body was made to do this, specifically designed by God to bring children into this world.
I'm excited that you're so excited! What a lucky friend you have. :)