Thursday, January 29, 2009

What NOT to Wear

Have you ever seen that show? Basically, they take a woman who doesn't have clothes from this decade, or any clothes that fit, and make her get rid of all of them and go out and buy new ones. They give her tips and suggestions for what would look good on her. Well, I've been thinking about it a lot lately.

I can feel myself becoming a prime candidate for this show. I feel it. I am morphing into one of those women. I used to watch the show and wonder, why do they let this happen, don't they realize what they look like? Now I know the answers to those questions. Let me tell you how it is happening to me.

It all started in middle school really. I lived in Brasil in grades 6-8. It was fabulous. I don't remember anyone caring at all what someone else wore. I remember wearing sweatpants to school, or whatever was comfortable, or whatever was clean. I don't remember ever thinking or worrying about my clothing. Period. Then we moved back to the United States, and my parents had me do eighth grade again. I won't get into the whys of that right now, but for the purpose of this conversation (clothes) it's a really good thing they did.

Apparently, here in the U.S., at my particular middle school institution anyway, they thought about clothes just about as often as they thought about algebra and the boy sitting in the next aisle. This was not so good for me. I managed to make friends with some really nice girls (I will always love you for that morning on my first day of school, Hannah.) and began the slow process of learning what NOT to wear to middle school, then to high school. The problem? I never Really cared about it. So, every now and then I'd dabble in "normal" school clothes, but most of the time it was still kind of, whatever.

Then I went to college, and I started spending money on clothes (sometimes), mostly jeans. I really had a thing for jeans. I looked good from 2002-2006, if I do say so myself. I mean, not fashion runway good, but presentable, she's not crazy good.

Then I graduated, and then I got married. For some strange reason, at this same time, I stopped buying clothes for myself. In that time, I have bought one pair of pants, and one shirt. (That's two years.) In that time, my body has gone through pregnancy, nursing, post-pregnancy, and post-nursing. Yikes.

I still wear the same old jeans, of which only two (I think I still have 6) do not have holes. I wear t-shirts (like from Devin's marathons = not attractive ones) and/or a sweatshirt every day. I have two sweaters. Now, I am not complaining. I just finally figured out what happened to those women on What NOT to Wear. When I get to that desperate point, I hope some friends will step in for an intervention, and I'll be ok for another 10 or 15 years.

Thanks guys!


  1. You're so funny. It's true though. There is something about marriage and not buying clothes. I think it is because Jeff was so surprised at how much I was paying for my clothes that I became surprised too, and now I don't want to spend money on clothes. Haha. The next time we're together, we'll have to go shopping and buy one cute shirt. Hey, at least you have a rockin' purse! Other than my pregnancy clothes, I also only have two pairs of jeans without holes in them. :( The other jeans did last a long time though. I've got to give that to the expensive jeans brands; they put up with abuse for years before the holes came.

    And I have to agree with you about Graded vs. Northside as well. We went to school with super rich kids in Brazil, but no one cared about what we were wearing. Then we move into mid-town USA, and what you were wearing was a big deal. Interesting.

  2. ames, i will totally bust in for an intervention if you ever get to that point when it is just awkward! i did make you cool afterall (haha, not true). not that i am a fashion queen, but i did used to roast you for wearing men's clothing back in middle/high school. what were you thinking??? (i am still not sure) lol

  3. I have to defend myself just a little. They weren't "men's" clothes, they were my older brother's clothes... and sometimes my mom's rockin sweaters!

  4. Haha....yes, my daily uniform has become jeans or sweatpants, a t-shirt and a sweatshirt that has a hoodie with strings (because Brennan loves playing with the strings). I do put on "nicer" clothes if I go to church or a wedding or something, but I totally agree...rather suddenly you realize you're now a prime candidate waiting to be ambushed by Stacy and Clinton.